Perhaps this post should be titled “Why Most of My Friends Think I’m Completely Nutso.”
Natural, unmedicated childbirth is important to my husband and me. We believe in it, we trust my body, and we desire it for the best birth experience. For us. For our babies.
Here’s why.
1. I don’t even like to take Tylenol. All medication comes with warnings of a variety of side effects; some minor, and some life threatening. I prefer the side effect of “temporary, life-giving pain” to the host of possible effects (however large or small) of an epidural. It’s what’s best for baby and mom. (Please remember, I’m talking about my babies and myself.)
2. The domino effect. For some women, an epidural is given as a last resort to relax the body so that the cervix will dilate. For many others, though, once an epidural is administered, an unfortunate domino effect occurs. Epidurals often lead to additional intervention. Mom can’t move, so mom can’t get into a productive birthing position. Labor is longer. Mom can’t feel the natural pushing urge, so mom’s pushes aren’t doing the job. Baby gets stressed out, so everyone gets (rightly) impatient and nervous. A c-section is performed or other measures (pitocin, suction, etc.) are taken to get the baby out already! (Is a c-section the worst thing to happen to your baby? You know I don’t think that! I do think, though, that it should be avoided whenever possible.)
3. Amazing bonding experience. Although I’d never let him admit it publicly 
, my husband works really hard with me during labor and delivery. The only thing he misses out on is the pain. He is my coach. He is my support. He is my advocate. He is my lifeline. I absolutely could not give birth without him, and we wouldn’t have it any other way. Coaching and supporting an unmedicated laboring wife is just plain different than hanging out and waiting until the magic number 10.
4. I’m not a risk taker. The only risks with an unmedicated birth? Pain. Productive, purposeful pain. I can handle that. The risks of an epidural? Not worth it for us.
5. Easier recovery. Oh, how I love getting out of my hospital bed as soon as I’m stitched up and have nursed and snuggled my baby! Actually, I might not even love it at the time, but I know it’s good for me. Oh, and no catheter. Yee-haw!
6. Childbirth is not a disease. It’s a natural, God-given process. I’m more of a member of the “Thank you God for giving us medicine to cure serious illness and disease” camp rather than the “Thank God for scientists who create all sorts of crazy things to keep us from any kind of discomfort or pain, good or bad” camp. Not all medicine is made (or used) for good.
7. Positive breastfeeding start. Trumping even natural childbirth, breastfeeding my babies is so incredibly important to me (more on that later). I know many a mom who successfully breastfeeds after a medicated birth, but the facts don’t lie. Getting an epidural may hinder breastfeeding, or at the very least, get mom and baby off to a slow, sleepy start. Again, a risk I’m not willing to take.
8. I’m a bit of a cheapskate. Even with insurance, we pay some money out of pocket for childbirth. An epidural is expensive, not only for the actual drug but also because the anesthesiologist has to be there the whole time. That would cost me an extra $400 at least. Are you kidding me?! That’s like earning $20 per hour during a 20 hour unmedicated labor. Sign me up! 
9. It’s Spiritual. I am in no way saying that medicated labor isn’t spiritual. All births are miracles! However, when I labor, I pray my way through the contractions. I give my body and my pain to God. I meditate on the undeserved suffering of the cross and how my temporary, productive pain can’t even compare. I think about Mary giving birth in a stable. I focus on the miracle of my body doing exactly what God made it to do. He holds my hand through the pain, and it is powerful!
10. It’s Empowering. Women who give birth naturally are no more incredible than other women. I don’t get an award or a badge or get to cut in line at the grocery store. I mostly get odd looks from family and friends. But… I am never more in awe of how God made my body than when I’m giving birth. He made me to do this! It doesn’t hurt when my hubby “brags me up,” either. For a woman with a usually low pain tolerance, giving birth naturally is a Finer Thing! (Oh, and it does crack us up when “extra” doctors and nurses and med students show up and ask if they can “observe the peaceful natural birth.” I guess we’re entertaining!)
The research is there; it’s both plentiful and powerful. When possible, natural unmedicated childbirth is best for mom and baby. I guess I just want the best.
Since I already know I’m way outnumbered here, can someone? anyone? share why you choose unmedicated childbirth?
*** Later this week we’ll start chatting about preparing and training for natural birth. It’s not something most people can just “plan on doing.”***
*** Catch up on the Why Didn’t Anyone Tell Me series.***
This post is linked to Top Ten Tuesday and Works for Me Wednesday.
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I’m pregnant with my second child and sure am enjoying this series. I had an epidural with my first and needed it. I wasn’t prepared for the pain at all. My bad. And after insurance, my epidural only costs $192! That was a good deal for me. But I understand that each person is different and I appreciate this point of view. I definitely plan on taking birthing classes this time around (again, my bad the first time) and hope that I am able to manage the pain better this time. But honestly, I love me an epidural! LOL
Nicole
I would totally have to agree with you. I had an epi with my first 2 kids but I really wanted to go natural (no medical interventions) with my 3rd. I ended up being high risk with gestacional diabetes so it ended up making things a little more interesting since my dr did not want me to go over my due date. Luckily my labor started a couple of hours before I was scheduled to be induced. It was one of the most bonding expirences I have ever had with my husband. I agree that I could never have done it without his love, support & understanding. I didn’t tear (I did really bad with both of my other children) which was awesome & there is nothing better than walking right after having a baby. I didn’t feel all weird like I did after the epi with my 2 older kids. Just an amazing experience. Also the risk of having a C-section was a big issue for me to avoid & like you said you decrease your risk by having no medical interventions.
What a blessing that your labor started just in time!
First of all, I just want to say that I think you did a very good job handling what can be a hot-button issue for some…
I had a natural childbirth with my first. (My second and third were unavoidable c-sections- you know the stories, Amy, so I’m not hijacking the comments with them!
) I went into the experience with a “I’m going to try this and we’ll see what happens” kind of attitude. Was there pain? Of course. Was it unbearable? I wouldn’t say so. I kept thinking I’d ask for something if it got worse… and then I was 9 1/2 cm dilated. My labor was 7 hr from start to finish, which I know is a fairly short labor with a first baby so I’m sure that helped me too. The biggest thing I wish many women knew is the difference in recovery from a c-section vs. a vaginal birth. While c-sections are SOMETIMES necessary, it is NOT natural to cut a baby out of your stomach. The pain of a natural delivery is just that- natural. And fleeting, by comparison. (Oh, and that “new mommy amnesia” they speak of regarding the pain? I think there’s some truth in that!)
“While c-sections are SOMETIMES necessary, it is NOT natural to cut a baby out of your stomach.” I can’t fathom because I haven’t been there, done that, but I appreciate your perspective and wisdom from both sides!
I chose natural birth with my second and third children. Well chosen isn’t really how the second one happened. She just flew out of me so fast I had no choice. But my third was by choice for many of the reasons you listed above. I just loved the recovery process and being “present” for my birth.
BTW- I am probably one of the least likely people to choose a natural birth. I have a very low pain threshold and whine about a hangnail. But I find the pain to be very manageable. If you focus, have a good coach and a good L & D nurse, I actually found it to be quite doable and as you said, very empowering.
I kinda wish one of my babies would “just fly out”
Yay for whiny moms being tough for natural birth! (that’s me, too!)
Amy, I had an epidural/episiotomy/forceps when my daughter was born. When I got pregnant w/my son I wanted to go natural. I didn’t want to feel separated from the whole process like I did w/my daughter. (Not that it wasn’t THE MOST amazing day of my life anyway.) And when my son was born w/no drugs, I felt so empowered and I said, “With Lydia, they handed her to me. But with Asa, I delivered him.”
If a mom is wavering on if they can do it—YES YOU CAN! It is an amazing experience that (shockingly) you want!
Can I link to unmedicated childbirth post?
In which I contemplate it: http://ohamanda.com/2008/07/10/contemplating-unmedicated-childbirth/
And do it:http://ohamanda.com/2008/09/30/the-pirates-arrival/
LOVE this series, Amy! Thanks for linking it to Top Ten {Tuesday}!
So glad you linked to your posts! And on Labor Day this year, I’m hosting a LABOR link up.
Be there!
I think you have laid out the arguments very well. I think we are coming back around to the idea that “natural” doesn’t mean hippy, it means healthy.
I’ve only had one daughter, so I have no basis for comparison, but I used the HypnoBabies program during my pregnancy and birthing and could not have been more happy with the results. Having a medicated childbirth just didn’t seem right to me…and I know that without the hypnotherapy help I would have been in trouble in the end. But when it came time to push and my energy levels were low, those scripts turned everything around and my daughter was born just minutes later. 11 hours birthing altogether, I walked to my bed from the birthing room right after birth (my nurses almost passed out because they were so shocked) and I was back to my self after just a few days. Totally unlike the zombie moms wandering around the floor in my maternity ward for days.
@Tiffany @ No Ordinary Homestead, I can appreciate this post and all of the comments, and I had three totally different birth experiences so far, but a mom that gets an epidural does not walk around the maternity ward like a zombie for days. That’s a little far-fetched of a comment in my opinion.
@Amy Clark,
To be honest, I never imagined that would cause such behavior either. Perhaps they had c-sections instead or were just not dealing well with new motherhood. But passing them in the hall was always a bit disturbing for me and out of 10 other women in there for 4 days with me (separate rooms thankfully) as that is the normal stay here in Germany, I was the only mother who back to her normal self after 2 days.
@Tiffany @ No Ordinary Homestead, I think the “zombie-like” state probably has as much to do with the competence of the anesthesiologist as anything… I know the vast difference between how I felt after my 2 c-sections was due to having an awesome anesthesiologist for the first and a sub-par one for the second. Some are exceptional and do a great job using just the right amount of medication for the individual mother and procedure… some? Not so much. The 2nd doctor overmedicated me so much my body temperature dropped dangerously low and I have no doubt I WAS zombie-like for awhile.:) But I was up and moving within a few short hours after the first… and THAT was the traumatic, emergency, baby-born-at-24-weeks one!
I’ve not heard of HypnoBabies. Sounds great, though!
I had a unmedicated home birth with my first daughter & I wouldn’t do it any other way. She was born in just 4 1/2 hrs.! Just like you, my husband was a wonderful coach! We are excitedly awaiting baby #2 in 3weeks & are planning the same home birth, praying for Gods blessing & protection!
Congratulations on the new baby. Do let us know when he/she arrives!
Hi Amy,
I’m in your camp. Not only did I have 2 un-medicated, natural births, but I had them at home with some outstanding mid-wives. And like you, I would not have been able to do so without my husband. It took my entire first pregnancy for me to mentally prepare for her birth. We took The Bradley Method courses, followed the bradley diet and read only books on natural labor(I love Ina Mae) and prayed a lot. I avoided all conversations with women who only told me about their horrific birth stories. I stopped watching those birthing tv shows on discovery health that take place in hosptial delivery rooms. I focused on a healthy, safe birth.
This choice isn’t for every women. Some of my friends for whatever reason can’t handle that I chose this way to birth my children. I chose a homebirth for many reasons, but the first was that as soon as I told my ob/gyn that I was pregant, we headed down a very medical road that I didnt’ want to take. I was 35, so that added a whole additional element. He actually kicked me out of his office when I told him I was having a home birth. Apparently I was a liability. I found another doctor who had no problem with me choosing home over hospital. He was my back up in case of an emergency and thankfully I didn’t need him.
I had only one ultra-sound at 8 weeks to confirm the pregnancy and from that point on, my mid-wife saw me. The appointments were in my home and very simple. I was in fairly good shape before the pregnancy and continued to excerise and eat well during it too.
Women have been told from doctors, the media, movies and tv that childbirth is scary, dangerous and we need interventions to get through it. I just don’t believe this. Women have been birthing naturally for thousands of years. We need to be encouraged and empowered, not broken down.
anyway…I could talk for hours on the subject…
Good Luck Amy.
Yay for the Bradley Method! I could talk for hours on the subject, too.
I had an epidural with my first two and had positive experiences but my third came so fast, I had no choice but to go natural! And I loved it! But labor was less than 2 hours so I didn’t have tons of pain. I loved feeling great and ready to go afterwards. My 4th was a c-section and I would avoid another c-section at all costs! Everything went well but the recovery is horrible, especially with three other little ones to take care of. Thankfully, we have tons of supportive family to help out~all moms need that no matter what kind of birth they have.
Thank goodness for family… and for 4 healthy births!
Amy-
Thanks for including this sentence in your post
“Women who give birth naturally are no more incredible than other women. I don’t get an award or a badge or get to cut in line at the grocery store. I mostly get odd looks from family and friends”
As someone who has given birth seven times with and without an epidural, what bothers me is the people who believe that having a natural childbirth is the only: right, holy, medically correct, and best way to give birth.
The most important thing in ANY birth is the health and safety of the baby and the mother. If this can be achieved with little or no intervention that is awesome. But sometimes it can’t and no one should feel guilty or like less of a mother if they need pain medication.
I really believe everyone should give natural childbirth a try and prepare to do it without pain medication. The people I know who have been prepared for an unmedicated birth usually are able to do it, and if they aren’t they don’t feel bad about the outcome.
Love this series Amy!
Toni
Preparation is key! And then if it doesn’t work out, there’s not so much of the “what if…”
I had all 4 kids naturally and unmedicated. With my first it was because my then partener had just had major surgery, and was one floor down from me. It was because I had to be an advocate for myself since he couldn’t be. It was also important I was available for him and the baby. I took upon myself to just do what I had to.
With the other 3 kids, I knew my body was capable and just did what I needed to do, which was labor for my babies. I was ready to be up and out of bed within a half hour and did so. I showered and dressed, walked the hall for a bit to feel more “normal”. I am not the kind of person that would tolerate having to stay down, and my doctor encouraged me the whole way. Baby 3 had some breathing troubles because of cord wrapped around her neck and I was able to get up and walk to the nursery to be with her while she was in the oxygen hood. If I had an epidural, I wouldn’t have been able to be with her so quickly.
“I took upon myself to just do what I had to.” Love that attitude!
Wonderful post Amy! Back in 07 when I initially found out I was pregnant I wanted to go au natural. But then I found out it was twins and that scared me a bit, and I figured for all of our safety (in case of an emergency) I would get the epi, I did get one when I was 8 cm dilated. So I think I felt a fair share of the labor pains. I did have my boys vaginally and I did feel my contractions and pushing. I had a bad reaction to the wearing off of the epidural and the other meds they put me on for pre e. I was able to breastfeed through the haze, but I would love to be able to get right out of the bed and walk or even think straight. So now if I were to have another singleton healthy baby I would want to have a natural un-medicated birth.
Do you have a method you and your husband use? Like bradley, lamaze?
I highly recommend the Bradley Method, and I’m not afraid to shout it from the rooftops.
My kids were born in the early 80′s and it was more common to have unmedicated births (which I did — twice).
I’m amazed how the norm today is to have an epidural. Congratulations to you for thinking it through and deciding on what women are able to do naturally.
You sound like my mom.
“Childbirth classes? Why? You just go in and push the baby out! Who needs meds?!” 
LOVE her!
My first pregnancy was with twins. It was highly recommended that I have an epidural in case anything went wrong during delivery then I could be wheeled into the operating room stat! I choose to do this, although it isn’t what I truly wanted. I thought that if the first delivery was problematic then it have been even more so for the second delivery and I didn’t want that. I was extremely tired and passed out from the blood loss when I got up, and compared to my later two deliveries, it took much longer to recoup. This may have had something to do with delivering twin and the last two deliveries were singletons. But, I could have went home immediately after giving birth and my baby was in my arms with my unmedicated deliveries. I was not tired or groggy, but just wanted to go home. My last two deliveries were non medicated and very fast. I will say that they call it labor for a reason,and it was definitely not pain free, but very doable.
I with you on the not liking to take medication. I rarely do even for a headache. I’m just not comfortable with it. I’m all for modern medicine and surgeries if needed, but for myself, if Ican get away with out them and still be fine that is most likely the path I will take. Everyone has their own preferrences and I don’t discriminate. The end result we all want is a healthy babe and mom, who am I to judge how the babe came into this world. I do love to hear birth stories.
I know nothing about birthing twins, but we’ve always secretly wanted to!
Thanks for this and all the comments, Amy. I desperately wanted to have an unmedicated birth with my daughter. But after 30 hours of labor and 2 nights without sleep, I caved and had the epi. (I was already 7 cm when I GOT to the hospital. I wish I had thought rationally, realized that was transition, and pushed on.) While I still think it was probably for the best, I then went on to have the MOST interventions you can have without a c-section.
I had internal monitoring, they gave me pitocin without asking, an episiotomy without my knowledge, and used the vacuum. They also told me if her heart rate dropped again I would have a c-section. The whole thing was very scary. I did ask them to turn off the epi during pushing so I could feel something.
I still feel like it wasn’t a bad birth for me. I was satisfied to push my little–VERY HEALTHY–baby into the world.
But since then I’ve been frustrated with it all. I am seeing a midwife this time and hope for a quicker birth with this second baby. (I was severely dehydrated with Libbie, which is why my labor was so long without progressing.) I may not have the “perfect” birth again, but I want to know I made my OWN choices this time.
Jessie
Oh mercy. You did have it all…
Staring into the eyes of that pretty little girl sure makes it all worth it, though!
In our Bradly classes, I was taught to drink after every single contraction. That helped immensely with the dehydration factor.
I was about 4cm dialated when I went to the hospital. The nurse broke my water while examining me. Then, she immediately got me started on epidural. I guess the guy that administered it hit a nerve or something. The whole left side of my body went numb from my head to my toes. Then, my blood pressure dropped and I started passing out. They got me back to reality, then gave me a lesser dose. I was still feeling weird, so they shut the epidural off. I felt everything during the pushing phase. To tell you the truth, the pain was horrible, but not unbearable. In fact, because I felt the pain, it not only encouraged me to get my baby out fast, but I could pinpoint where exactly to push. Then, after my little girl was born, I was so shaky from the epidural that I couldn’t even hold her. Even though I didn’t get hardly any epidural, I was still charged for it. Next time, I’m not getting it unless it is absolutely necessary.
What a mess. First they goof it up, then you feel all the pain for the hard part.
You’re right, though, feeling that pain does help with the pushing!
I wish, wish, wish I had known you before we had our 5 year old. I had already had some complications with the pregnancy (I was allergic to my own pregnancy hormones – ack!), and they induced labor a week earlier than her due date. I was okay with that then, because I was simply miserable. But, even though my contractions weren’t that bad, they still did the epidural. I ended up having a C-Section. That was the worst! I always wondered about a possible connection between the C-Section and our breastfeeding struggles!
If I had it to do over again, I would definitely be more informed and KNOW what I wanted for me and for my baby. I’m glad you’re doing this series, especially for first-time moms-to-be!
Your story is the reason I wrote this post! I’ve heard it too many times — induce, epidural, c-section… so unfortunate. BUT — I’ve seen your beautiful daughter and have to say you won in the end.
Great post…. My sister chose natural childbirth and it was the best thing for her. I, unfortunately, had to have C-sections for all three of my breech babies, so I missed out.
I agree w/ Toni – love the line you added about “Women who give birth naturally are no more incredible than other women”. It’s funny that you mention you mostly get funny looks when I (someone that gladly said give me the epidural) feels the very opposite – that friends can’t believe I’d do that to my baby!! It’s just unfortunate that we’re always so quick to judge others decisions. It’s also interesting how many people say they chose natural delivery to be “present”, where I chose an epidural to be “present” – maybe I just had a good experience, but I felt completely in the moment & very aware.
And thanks Amy – your site always feels like a safe place to comment, even if opinions vary:)
Thrilled to have your comment AND your story. I know LOTS of “happy epidural” mamas myself.
In addition to most of the reasons you gave – including the fact I don’t even take Tylenol, (a huge blessing of heath!) I also am choosing unmedicated. This may sound a bit strange, but pain in childbirth is a part of the curse after the Fall and I want to experience that.
In addition and for the sake of honesty, the slight fear – ok, terror – of a needle in my spine. I don’t mind needles at all, just don’t put them in my body’s nerve center.
With my first birth coming next month, we’ll see how it actually happens and what the Lord has planned for me.
Doesn’t sound strange to me at all. (I don’t want a needle in my spine, either. )
@Sarah M, as a fellow believer, I have to say that *does* sound a bit strange. I don’t think the curse is God’s will for humanity, but rather a prediction of the results of the fall. Just another perspective for believers out there.
Nice to meet you ladies
Seven natural childbirths for me! Four very difficult…and only in the strength of God possible. A very humbling experience. To be able to be a witness of the power of God at work…after all, it’s not about us, it’s about who He is and giving Him the glory!
And a constant reminder of His grace…because mankind dis-obeyed in Paradise we feel the full effect of sin in childbirth. I could only think of His great mercy in Jesus, redeeming us, so we will not have to live in eternal pain. In all the strife of mortal life our feet shall stand securely!
Humbling. Very, very true!
As much as I knew I would not get an extra gold star for doing natural childbirth, I agree with everything above and managed four completely natural childbirths (even with complications) UNTIL our fifth. In the final hour, I made the biggest mistake EVER, and still regret it. Oh well, it’s years later, but still wish I had done all five naturally.
I want to hear more about that 5th baby. Skype, maybe?
With my first, I had no pain killing drugs, but they gave me a LOT of pitocin. I really thought that I was going to die, I even told the doctor that. He said, “stop that, you’re making me nervous,” The baby did not want to come out, the nurse told me that “even a quadriplegic can push out a baby.” That was helpful from a skinny young thing with no children. The doctor had to use forceps (the doctor had a red face, veins popping out, foot up on the bed, pulling, etc.) to finally get him out. That was VERY scary. Baby was 8 lbs 11 oz. and I had a third degree tear. That was NOT a pleasant experience. Then, they MADE me get up a while later after all the stitches and I passed out. And I still had more children…….
With Baby #2, I went to the doctor, she said I was dilated, so they wheeled me over to the hospital and then put me in a room and promptly told me to get up and walk. That was amusing, like why couldn’t I just have walked from the doctor’s office (it was an underground tunnel)? They broke my water and baby #2 came very fast, they caught her in a towel, no gloves, nothing, but I got a HUGE hematoma in a very uncomfortable place, so the recovery really was just as horrible as with #1 even though she was a lb. lighter.
With #3, my water broke Nov. 12 and I was not due until December 6th. I was not ready. We had just moved, just closed on a house, the crib was not set up, we were like, HELLO! I got some pain killers with her (just enough to make me woozy and not able to hold her after delivery). She was the easiest and the recovery was the easiest, but I would not have the drugs if I had it to do over as I would prefer to be 100% there and able to hold my babies.
The biggest thing that I would say I learned is that you are in charge, you don’t have to do everything that they suggest and you are free to ask a million questions. Knowing ahead of time what you truly desire and communicating that would be helpful, so that when you and the doctor are in crisis mode, they already know your desires and preferences. It is hard to think clearly with all the commotion and pain in a delivery room. I was young with all of my kids, 20, 22 and 23 with each one, I would definitely be more assertive now, still gracious, Lord willing, but more assertive…….
How did you not strangle that nurse?!
“you are in charge, you don’t have to do everything that they suggest and you are free to ask a million questions. Knowing ahead of time what you truly desire and communicating that would be helpful, so that when you and the doctor are in crisis mode, they already know your desires and preferences.” Wise words!
My first was induced, for really no other reason than I didn’t know better. My second was “helped along” after labor started and ended up with an epidural and suction, and pushing his huge (10#3) backwards facing body through the epidural gave me lasting muscle damage in my lower back that hurts like heck to this day (he’s 9). My third I signed up with a doula and really wanted to go at it naturally, but she wound up breech. Even after changing doctors to one who was supposed to be more willing to do a normal breech delivery I had to have a c-section. The only reason I “got to” have a natural delivery with the fourth was because he was a mid-term still-birth. With the fifth no one was willing to do a VBAC, but that c-section turned out to be a life-saver for me. The placenta had grown through the uterine wall and if they hadn’t already been inside to see that I would have, in all likelihood, bled out pretty quickly. They took everything out with him so I won’t have another opportunity. I’ve had many types of deliveries and four of them ended with happy, healthy babies. The one that didn’t couldn’t be helped, and I’ve made peace with all the choices and outcomes. Now if the pain in my back would just go away…
So, so sorry about the still-birth. Can’t imagine the heartache.
Amy, this has been a great series, and I have enjoyed the articles I have read – although I must admit I have slightly avoided them because they only make my “baby itch” worse!
I’ve had three children – all super rapid labors. With the first, I was young and naive and just followed “dr’s orders,” had an epi and had to use forceps. With my 2nd, hubby was deployed so the experience already started off on a bad note, and I was induced b/c of toxemia. Due to the induction, my body would not pace itself, so I caved and had the epi – which made me throw up, and the baby came out in the bed with me. Literally. Like Jill said, with my 3rd, the labor was so fast there was no time for medication. It was the most intense hour of my life! And I wouldn’t have made it through without my husband!! He was a great coach, and great support – and the experience was priceless! But with all three children, I was up, out of the bed, and cleaning the hospital room within just an hour or so – with or without the epi. And I nursed all three right away as well.
Because my labors are so fast, I don’t know that I’m a good advocate for either method of delivery – with or without medication. I can say for sure though, that the natural, non-medicated birth of our son was definitely the most connected hubby and I have felt during the delivery!
And cleaning the hospital room?! What in the world… that’s why I GO to the hospital… so someone else can clean up my mess!
You are doing such a fabulous job with this series Amy. I still owe you a post and it’s been about half done for weeks. As soon as I get home tomorrow I’m finishing that sucker!
I chose an un-medicated birth for my second baby for two main reasons:
1) My first birth, while being rewarded at the end with a beautiful baby, was really not a great experience. Everything went the exact direction I did not want it to go. I was very determined the second time around to not have any of that happen if I could help it.
2) YOU! I remember reading either a post or a string of comments a while back when you were talking about your birth experiences and I thought… If she can do that 3 times, then I can certainly try it once!
I can say right now, 3 months later, that the unmedicated birth was by far the best of my two experiences and I am so glad we did it. It was a fabulous bonding time for my husband and I, I wasn’t all groggy afterward like my first time, and the breastfeeding started off really well (unlike my first baby). It was not easy and there were definitely a couple of times that I cried out “I can’t do this!” but my wonderful husband and my delivery team replied “Yes you can!” My next baby, barring any complications, will for sure be another natural one, I loved it.
Aw… you’re so sweet! And I’m so proud of you!
I almost forgot… the other thing I loved about going natural was that after a short nap I had the energy to get up out of my hospital bed and play (carefully, so as not to tear my stitches) with my 3-year old who had just become a big brother. It was wonderful to not be all passed out and ignore him.
Hi Amy! Thanks for doing this series. We are expecting our sixth baby in December, and are planning on our second homebirth with a midwife. The first three boys were all born in a hospital with an epidural, the fourth was a natural birth in the hospital, the fifth was home birth. I know that every woman experiences pain differently, but for me, the pain of having to lie on my side and lie still while the epidural was inserted (sometimes having to be re-inserted, because they didn’t get it right the first time) was MUCH worse than the natural labor pains of contractions. Also, when you are in the hospital setting, the staff will want…and sometimes, depending on the staffing levels, NEED you to conform to the medical model of birth: i.e., they want you lying down, in the bed, attached to the monitors, so they can manage several labors at once from the nurses station. This runs totally counter to the way a woman’s body is designed to labor. If you are able to stand up, walk, move around, and choose positions as they feel most comfortable to you, the pain is much more manageable and generally the labor will proceed more smoothly. If you are in a hospital setting, you may have to fight for these options every step of the way, and the very interventions that they put in place to try to manage your laborand to protect themselves legally may very well stall or prolong your labor and greatly increase your chance of needed a c-section.
I was up and making breakfast for the other boys in the morning and felt like a million bucks.
By contrast, at home, you and your midwife can plan for a natural labor and take every step possible to encourage it. In my case, the homebirth was so much more peaceful and had far less pain – both during and after delivery – than my hospital births, that it was like night and day.I labored standing up, leaning on the back of a kitchen chair, and after only about 3 hrs, the baby was born, we tucked him into our bed between us, the midwife cleaned everything up and we went to sleep.
I am very thankful that we DO have talented OB/GYNs around to handle the true emergencies and save the lives of moms and babies. But those are exceptional cases. Unfortunately, the medical, “managed” model of birthing in a hospital setting makes those exceptional cases far more common than they need to be.
When birthing in the hospital (as I do) you definitely have to make certain they let you labor the way you NEED to labor… and not what makes it easy on them. Your home birth sounds beautiful!
I gave birth to my first child one month ago today. We had a home birth, so an epidural wasn’t even an option. Yes, it hurt. A lot. But what surprised me was that it wasn’t as bad as everybody makes it sound. It’s hard and painful, yes, but not impossible by any means. People make it seem so bad that women question their ability to give birth naturally. It’s undermining their confidence in their body’s capability! I loved my experience at home and wouldn’t change a thing.
It honestly never occurred to me to have a home birth… until I started blogging and reading everyone’s beautiful stories!
Yes, yes, yes!
You know I totally agree with you! 
Thanks so much for saying this so well.
(I’m so excited for you to give birth to this new little one!)
Blessings,
Michele
All I have to say is, go you. I had epidurals and other pain medication; that was the best choice for us; but I have so much respect for women who do it the natural way.
I wanted a natural unmedicated birth for the reasons you just stated. However, as my labor progressed, I was in excruciating pain from the back labor. I really thought I was going to die! I ended up getting the epidural, and I am so glad I did. I think there are some instances where having it is a good decision. Back labor being one of them. It is so different from normal labor. That being said, I waited so long to get it that it only worked for about an hr and a half. I still felt everything when I pushed her out. I didn’t have any complications whatsoever though. She breastfed beautifully immediately after birth and got a 9 on her Apgar score. I honestly think that if I had not relaxed there would have been complications or labor would have been drawn out. It was the bravest thing I have ever had to do, though because I had psyched myself out that epidurals were awful things that only led to problems ect.
Back labor is so hard! I endured it with our second. My only advice is to sit sideways, cross-legged) in a whirlpool tub with the jets right on your back. That provided some relief for me. Miserable, though! So glad you had a beautiful, healthy birth!
although ive never had an epidural with my 3, with the first 2 i did have the iv pain meds with the older 2(the youngest i didnt even make it to the hospital when she decided to make her entrance). all of mine were fast(1st-5hours, 2nd-2 1/2hrs and he was the biggest over 10 pounds, and the 3rd less than 30 minutes) and none had complications from the iv meds(or me, I was up and dressed as soon as they let me)
Less than 30 minutes?! From start to finish?! WOW!!!!!!!!!
Hi Amy. I wish this series I come sooner, as I’m enjoying it greatly. (My first son was born in April) I committed to a natural childbirth, had a dear friend as a coach along with my husband… but all said and done my water had been leaking for nearly a week and the doctor wouldn’t let me go home after a routine appointment so into the hospital I went. I didn’t want Pitocin, but after 22 hours of Pitocin, labor cramps, and only 4 cm dilated I was given the option of an epidural or tough it out until I had a C-section. (They would only let me labor on another 4 hours because of the water issue.) So I took the epidural and had my son 3 hours later.
Honestly, I was heartbroken that it didn’t go as I wanted, but my son is healthy and breastfeeding has been very successful for me so it wasn’t all disappointing.
“but my son is healthy and breastfeeding has been very successful for me so it wasn’t all disappointing.” Not at all! I might post a few “helps” to get those contractions going in future series posts, but truly… if nothing works, get that baby out.
I too am enjoying this series a lot. I’ve had two natural, unmedicated births at a birth center, and I am planning to do the same with the baby who is due Feb. 6. The midwives were experienced and calm, and my husband was a wonderful support. I didn’t tear at all either time, and that was partly due to the midwives’ care and guidance. We left for home four hours after the births, and wheelchairs were nowhere in the picture.
Birth is not a “walk in the park,” but neither is it unbearable, forever-remembered pain. If it were, there would be a whole lot more “only” children in the world! I truly believe that God created our bodies in an amazing way to be able to go through childbirth successfully (“pregnancy is not a disease”) and even be an honor to Him in the process. There’s no need for screaming or cursing or out-of-control behavior if we are depending on Him.
One other minor thing that hasn’t been mentioned yet: in normal labor, there is time between contractions to recover a bit and get ready for the next one. (I believe Pitocin reduces that time.) In fact, the time between contractions is longer than the contractions for the most part! I think that’s God’s way of giving us a break to recoup and refocus. And the results are all worth it–a baby that is alert and unaffected by drugs or other interventions.
Yes! I was literally falling asleep in between contractions with our first!
Thank you for this post! It sums up my thoughts perfectly and completely resonates with me. I also am a natural childbirth nutso. Four times I have chosen to go this route. I firmly believe it is better for Mom, Baby, and Dad. I have had great labors and deliveries, much of which I beleive is from no drugs. It speeds the labor up and really helps with recovery. It is how God made us, and we can do it.
Just a quick note to say that I am with you! I am a big proponent of natural childbirth when possible (and typically it is possible). I had no idea what I didn’t know about birth until I was pregnant and ended up finding a certified nurse midwife to do our hospital delivery. She pointed me towards Bradley childbirth classes and I learned and asked questions and got outraged and learned more and asked more and learned more. It became quite a process!
We ended up having way too many interventions in our first labor (even being very educated and quite the advocates for ourselves). Basically my water broke and labor didn’t kick in and I was Strep B + so after about 26 hours of working hard to get labor moving I had to go on pitocin and after two rounds of that and getting to 8 I was told that if I didn’t get an epidural I would be the next c-section on the table. I agreed (to avoid the c-section) and about 46 hours after my water broke I pushed out my little boy. He didn’t really nurse and was very tired, but I didn’t realize how much so until my recent second birth.
I had my daughter at a free standing birth center with a licensed midwife. She took over 41 weeks to arrive, but did so after only 3 1/2 hours of close together contractions. In fact we were only at the center for an hour before she was born. Instead of 2 1/2 hours of pushing, I had 25 minutes. Instead of broken water and no labor, my water broke after I was ready to push. I had no drugs and she didn’t cry, just ‘talked’ to us. She was born in the water and was awake and interested in us for over 3 hours. She nursed like a champ for over an hour before she fell asleep and slept for 4 hours straight. She has been an amazing sleeper, unlike her brother (didn’t sleep for more than 4 hours until he was 7 months old and she has already).
I can’t say it is all due to her birth, but it seems to be more common than not with water babies. She is just so peaceful. Again, I think knowledge is power and unless you know to ask the questions you will not be told the facts. I just wish more women would decide to be really informed about birth and not just ‘go with the flow.’ That said, I am also grateful for those medical professionals that are there when we need them for emergencies. I needed some surgery and was glad that OBs can do surgery when it is needed. My friend had a placental abruption and thank God they could save her and the baby. They have a place, but so do midwives and natural birth!
Great series!
Heather
Oooo, we got mad too, when we learned some of the things in our Bradley class. So sad the information that people aren’t freely given! I would love to have a water birth someday… but it doesn’t look like it’s going to happen any time soon.
I’ll live vicariously through the stories of my readers. 
great post! i really wanted to go natural with my delivery (my first), but found out baby was frank breech at 38 wks. my midwife helped me find a dr that specialized in delivering breeches and i was willing to try, however they would only deliver breech up until 10 days overdue. my stubborn little guy was past that, so they scheduled me for a c-section. not my first choice, but i had to remind myself that having a healthy baby came first! i did have an epidural. my midwife made sure that my son was brought to me asap, and he latched on no problem 1/2 hr after he was born! so for me, it went as well as it could have, but i’m definitely hoping for a great VBAC with the next. for me, having the support of my husband and midwife is essential!
What a blessing to have your midwife there to help post-surgery!
Thanks for this post! Natural isn’t for everyone, but I hope this will make more women consider it. I have worked as a doula in the past and am now in nursing school in my OB clinical. As a doula, I don’t think I could every work in labor and delivery as a nurse and have to witness day in and day out the crazy things they put moms though needlessly! I have two wonderful healthy sons and uncomplicated births, but one of my biggest regrets is that I did not go natural with my second son. I told my now x-husband how important it was to me and talked endlessly with him on how to help me and what to say, etc. BUT…..during my 5th strong contraction he said “do you want me to get the epidural guy”!! .lol I don’t know how a women can go natural without a great husband/coach or a great doula!
I know I SO appreciate the support of my husband! Fortunately I’ve had a wonderful experience in our hospital/birth care center and can only brag on the doctors and nurses. Or maybe it’s just because we adamantly told them what we were going to do!
With my first, I got an epidural. It didn’t “work” because it was too late by the time the anesthesiologist got it in.
So I had all the negatives–unproductive pushing, sleepy baby who wouldn’t nurse, bigger hospital bill, catheter, longer recovery, etc–with little or no pain relief. Then my second was born twenty minutes after we got to the hospital–no epidural, obviously–and it wasn’t all that bad.
So with number three, born in April, I decided to go unmedicated. It did hurt and was a lot of work (and tearing), but it was so worth it. Labor was a great bonding time for Dh and me as we prayed, read verses and anticipated our new little one. He was a super-alert baby and great nurser right away. He was even turning his head towards noises in the delivery room moments after birth. I felt much better and recovered more quickly. Having done it both ways, I prefer the unmedicated birth. I know emergencies can change plans, but should the Lord bless us with more children, I would want to do it without the epidural again.
Ugh. I’ve heard stories like yours before. Double whammie. Love me some alert new babies!
Hi! I am enjoying reading your series and it was interesting to read this post about unmedicated childbirth. I have two small children, both were c-section babies and I opted to have the c-section a week before their due date. I had had two miscarriages prior to my first baby and was closely monitored my whole pregancy by my ob and a perinatologist. The closer we got to the birth, the estimated weight of my baby was 9 lb 12 oz (and no I did not have gestational diabetes). It was the advice of my Dr. and I trust her completely that I have a scheduled c-section. Her reasoning was that vaginal childbirth in the case of a big baby was safer for the mommy but not as safe for the child because of the risk of getting the shoulders stuck. She said a c-section was safer for the baby and put me more at risk. Given those two options, I decided on the c-section for the safety of the baby. After it was all over and looking at my childbirth experiences, I am happy with my choice. My babies were healthy and yes my daughter was 9 lb 12 oz and my son 20 months later was 10 lb 10 oz. Both c-section experienecs were great for me and and I was able to nurse both babies right after with no complications whatsoever. So in the beginning when I started out while I would have preferred a natural childirth, I am happy with the c-section and the ending of two healthy babies.
@Tracy, I had a similiar situation to you, with a doc who refused to do a c-section to deliver my 10 lb. baby. The result was that my little girl has a paralyzed arm, which she will have to endure for the rest of her life (despite 3 operations). We realize that this was in God’s plan for her, but natural birthing was simply not the right choice to have made for her case. I’m glad your doctor had better sense that that!
Just wanted to chime in that not every ‘big’ baby gets stuck. My second baby was 9 lbs, 6 ounces and was born in much less time with no interventions when compared to my first. I realize that things do happen in labor and birth and I am so happy that you are happy with your decision. I just also want other moms to know that bigger babies can be safely (and in my case more easily) delivered than even some smaller babies. So much has to do with delivery positioning, mom’s health, coaching and knowledge of care provider.
@Heather,
I too have big babies so I understand!! My first was a bad experience as she got stuck. My second was a planed c/s and it was GREAT and I was so alert! He nursed right away. However, having my first we had no idea how big she was and waiting (because I was stuborn) ended up causing more home. I couldn’t hold her for 6 hours and was in SEVERE pain from labor on top of a rushed c/s. My second c/s which was PLANNED was great and I was so happy i listen to my dr or I would have likely been in the same boat as I too just have big healthy babies.
“So much has to do with delivery positioning, mom’s health, coaching and knowledge of care provider.” Very, very true! I hope to write a post about labor/delivery positions soon.
So happy for you that you delivered two big, beautiful babies.
That breastfeeding went well early on… a perfect bonus!
I highly recommend watching the documentary called “The Business of Being Born.” It was eye-opening and convinced my husband and I that natural childbirth was worth looking into. The research is definitely there! I wish everyone was presented with all of the facts and didn’t just go along with what there doctors tell them. Be your own advocate (and your baby’s, as well)!
Don’t believe I’ve seen that. Thanks for the recommendation!
I can’t wait for next week! I have had 2 Pitocin-induced deliveries, both with epidurals. Granted, my insurance is incredible, so the epidural only costs us $85 out of pocket, but I’d REALLY love to have an unmedicated birth this time. I’m only 15 weeks, so I’m hoping I have enough time to prepare!
My sister-in-law had a pitocin-induced birth with no epidural, and her sunny-side-up baby was nearly 10 pounds. To this day, I have NO IDEA how she did that… but I suppose she showed us all that it can be done.
I’ve enjoyed this series as well. I have had very different circumstances than you, with complications for myself and my babies. How I wish that I could have had my birth stories go as I planned! But God has a plan for all of us. I am glad to have taken the wise advice of two of my docs (my daughter would have died, had I given birth at home). Each of us should have a desire in mind, and be willing to change with the circumstances, using God-given common sense. And also have a doctor we can trust. Had I gone with my instincts in my first delivery, my precious daughter would not have the life-changing neurological injures she has! Life doesn’t always go the way we plan!
Having a doctor you can trust is definitely a top priority!
This is a great post. I love how you handled such a hot topic. I chose natural childbirth for the same reasons as you, Amy, but my breech baby prevented that from happening. Where I live, there are no midwives and no doctors here will deliver babies breech naturally, so once my doctor tried (unsuccessfully) to turn my daughter in the womb, we had no option but surgery. So while I did have a c-section, you handled this topic so well that I was not in the least bit offended.
Because I have had a c-section, I feel like I’ve got enough perspective to agree heartily with you on all of your reasons, but especially #7, A Positive Breastfeeding start. Breastfeeding is a real challenge after a c-section. Because of being sewn up and some time spent in recovery, you miss the narrow window of alertness for a baby. The worst part is that a medicated woman’s body simply does not respond the way that it should. Next time (in 6 1/2 months!), I’ll be sure to ask for a breast pump or something to make things work as they should!
Nursing after a c-section can be a real struggle, but it can be done. It took two weeks to teach my daughter to latch, since we had a terrible start in the hospital. But I want your readers to know that, should they have to have a c-section, breastfeeding can happen, with enough prayer, determination, and support from family and lactation specialists. After those rough 2 weeks, we had a wonderful, easy 16 1/2 months of breastfeeding.
Thank you for your kind words. Sounds like you had the right doctor. It’s great that he at least tried to turn the baby! So proud of you for sticking with breastfeeding even after a bad start. I’ll be writing about that in this series!
@Amy, We were very blessed by our doctor–SHE was fabulous. We had discussed natural childbirth early on as well as my desire to avoid a C-section at all costs, and she was 100% supportive.
As for breastfeeding, I grew up seeing my mother nurse my siblings, so in my mind, there was no other way to properly feed my child. I think a determined mom and enough support makes all the difference in the world when it comes to breastfeeding success. Can’t wait to see what you have to say on nursing. I need to blog in depth about our struggle, because many moms think (as I did) that it should be easy.
Amy:
Kudos to you for writing this!
All of my four childrens’ births were unmedicated, natural births. We took a “let’s see” approach on baby #1 and were blessed by the results. The babies were so alert, not to mention the fact that I was able to get up and take a shower! BUT I was proactive with my doctor and reminded the staff at delivery of my decision. Women have been birthing babies naturally for thousands of years and I encourage every mom-to-be to seriously consider its benefits.
And kudos to you for making it work with the “let’s see” approach. I don’t think many people have that kind of success if they aren’t well-prepared. Awesome!
Thanks for such an articulate and sensitive explanation of the benefits of natural childbirth! DH and I chose the natural route early in my pregnancy, for many of the same reasons you mention: minimizing the risk of harmful side effects, successfully establishing breastfeeding, and avoiding the intervention cascade.
Then, at 35 weeks, I started having complications. Our baby stopped developing in utero, my amniotic fluid level dropped, and I went into early-stage liver failure from preeclampsia. Intervention became a life-saving necessity, not something to be avoided. Even in that situation, however, we were able to salvage some elements of our birth plan. Because my doctor was committed to natural birth, she artfully mixed intervention and natural methods to keep me and the baby safe without completely medicalizing the birth or interfering with breastfeeding. She also personally intervened with nurses who gave our doula a hard time or got too intervention- or medication- happy, both during and after the birth.
I tell my story to as many women as I can because I want everyone to know that we don’t have to accept the default response to pregnancy complications. When we’re educated, we’ll be more likely to know if an intervention is really necessary or just a rote reaction. And we should be teachable, but never afraid to question our providers–a good doctor/midwife/doula/nurse is not afraid of questions and will give a clear answer.
Yours is a beautiful story. How awesome to have a doctor that will advocate for you!
@Amy, Our doula was amazing, too! We hired her on recommendation from my doctor, and we were so thankful we did. Since the hospital nurses were not at all interested in encouraging a natural birth (I think they thought all of us, including my doctor, were insane), we would have been lost without her.
There could also be other issues involved like dramatic blood loss, or extra drugs–like morphine for someone whose insides weren’t numb because their spinal didn’t take and had to have general anesthesia for a c-section. I experienced both of these with different deliveries, and they can definitely make you seem a little out of it in various ways. But, I had an easy time after my 1st c-section and didn’t feel zombie-like at all.
I only wish I were familiar with point of views like Amy’s before I ever had my first child. I was ignorant. I can’t change the past. Andt, either way, I have some beautiful little boys!
Eeek, you’re scaring me.
You’re right… can’t change the past. I hope to “catch” a few newly pregnant women and inspire them to be well-prepared for birth. Celebrate those little boys every day!
No babies here, yet. I appreciate your honest post, and thoroughly enjoyed reading the comments. Thank you for your series!
I haven’t been blessed with pregnancy yet, and up until last week I would’ve said, “Sign me up for an epidural!” But then I watched the documentary “The Business of Being Born” and now my thinking has changed completely. This post just confirmed the research presented in the film and definitely gives me the hope that if and when I have a baby, I can do it naturally!
Yay! I wrote this post (and this series!) for women like you.
I agree wholeheartedly with this post. My first child was a medically necessary c-section and I was devastated. I fought with my OB, but with placenta previa, I had no choice.
I need this type of birth experience and I’m hoping that I will birth my second child in this way. I was trying to explain to my husband why I needed to have a natural childbirth and why the c-section was so devastating to me (I never even got to go into labor and the recovery was terrible, I lost lots of blood and narrowly escaped the ICU and also narrowly escaped a hysterectomy) and I just can’t put it into words. It’s for my health and my child’s health, but I also think there is something spiritual about a natural birth, being so in-tuned to your body and something so essentially womanly.
I credit our breastfeeding and my stubborn need to avoid formula at all costs in my recovery physically and emotionally. Proving to me that my body was able to nourish this child even though I felt that I didn’t “properly” birth him (he was also born at 36 weeks, technically a preemie so I didn’t risk going into labor and bleeding out…) was what I needed to recover.
Thanks for this great post!
kudos to you for staying strong and getting stubborn enough to make breastfeeding work in a difficult situation. That’s what it takes sometimes.
While I appreciate the desires of so many women to have natural deliveries, and I had planned on one myself, sometimes women’s bodies do not cooperate. I was healthy through both of my pregnancies, and went into labor without inducement for my first child. However, my labor failed to progress, and my baby was in distress, so I had a c-section. I don’t regret it for a moment. The “guilt trip” laid on me by some who felt I should have held out longer is really their problem, not mine. I had a healthy, beautiful, 8 lb 6 oz baby girl. And I lived to have another child some 3 years later, a healthy, 7 lb 12 oz baby boy. He was also delivered by c-section, because again, labor didn’t progress and he was in distress. I’m grateful for modern medicine, that probably saved the life of me and my children. One hundred years ago I would have died during my daughter’s birth, and my sweet daughter and handsome son would never have lived. I think God had a reason for that, as well.
I’m sorry you’ve faced the “guilt trip”.
I have relatives who didn’t progress and had to have c-sections, too. Grateful for the doctors and meds that took care of them!
How about reason number 11. When you arrive at the hospital already at 10 cm and the insensitive nurse says, “Were you planning on an epidural?” You can say, “No.” And then when she says, “Good, because it’s too late for one now,” you can just give her the “I can’t believe you are so insensitive look” rather than trying to jump up off that hospital bed to claw her eyes out because you were counting on that epidural! Yup, that was me with baby #1.
We did Bradley Childbirth classes – LOVED them and the method BTW.
LOL — Oh, mercy. Nice not to have to go through full labor at the hospital, though, I hope.
I had all 4 of my kiddos au naturel, for many of the reasons you spoke of. Very happy with my choice, and having a husband who supported and encouraged that choice made a huge difference. Having my doctor on board helps even more. I went into each pregnancy knowing I didn’t want to have an epidural; trying to look at it in the same way I would an athletic event–pushing myself through the pain for a goal.
But that didn’t stop me from stopping with a contraction in the parking lot on the way into the hospital for baby #3 and telling my husband, “I don’t know if I can do this without an epidural again…”
I said “I don’t know if I can do this anymore” in the middle of my back labor transition with our second baby. Oh, that hurt! But we did it…
I have 4 kids. I had an epidural with 3 of them. All with bad results. After 2 bad recoveries from an epidural I wanted to go natural with my 3rd. I wasn’t prepared though and caved at the last minute. With my 4th I was much more prepared, but did get scared when it came time to push. But it was so worth it to go natural, I would totally do it again. My recovery was so much easier than my other 3. I am so, so glad I didn’t have pain meds with my last child and wish I had been strong enough and known enough to go that route with my first 3.
I’m not glad for you… but glad to hear you say “I wasn’t prepared.” I truly, honestly believe that if more women prepared for natural birthing they’d be more confident and it would work better for them.
All three of my births have been unmedicated. Your reasons are all very true for us too, but I’ll add one more for anyone who might also have low blood pressure. We had serious reservations about any non-emergency interventions before I even became pregnant. Then in child birth classes at the hospital, they mentioned that sometimes epidurals cause Mom’s blood pressure to go down. I already have low blood pressure. I asked my OB what that could mean for me if I had an epidural, and she said, “Oh, we have drugs to fix that…” And we decided that drugs to fix side effects of drugs was not where we would like to end up.
Oh my! I don’t think I knew that, and I have REALLY low blood pressure. Phew!
This. Is. Beautiful. I’ve only been to your site a handful of times, but I’m so glad I stopped by today. I have had a hard time explaining to many people why I’ve chosen to have three unmedicated births without sounding like I am defending myself in a court of law. It always bothers me that women think they are choosing the “easy way” with an epidural when in fact it can be far more complicated for them AND for their baby. I can’t think of anything that I’d add to your beautifully written post! I found myself saying “YES! YES!” at every point. It is empowering and gratifying to hear my husband truly partner with me in the birthing process, and this last time to have the skeptical doctor-on-call gain respect for me as she observed my contractions, finally telling me that I was “good at this.” I want others to know it’s possible, and I’m honored to be a cheerleader for anyone who tells me they are even considering it. All three of my babies (ages 6, 3, and 4 months) have had a great start, and I love being able to give God the glory for getting me through the hardest parts!
Ah, thanks! I would so love to be a doula (when my children grow up) or in some other way provide support to couples who choose unmedicated birth.
I’ve had three unmedicated births (the third was born at home) and am preparing now for a fourth unmedicated home birth. For all the reasons you listed, that is why we have chosen to go the unmedicated route. Plus I plain old don’t trust most doctors- they are not always in it for my (or my baby’s) best interests. And when I read I’d have to have a catheter if I got an epidural, well- that scared me right out of wanting one once and for all!
I think that’s one of the most important things mama’s can do… find a doctor or other birthing professional you can trust right away!
I wanted so badly to have natural childbirth with both of mine. They were both on my spine and I was having terrible amounts of pain with my sciatic nerve. Past the point of being able to focus at all. I’m still hoping to able to have natural childbirth. I will keep trying with each child. My Mom is my hero. She’s had 10 of us so far, and I think 6-7 of us were natural. And I know for certain that 5 of us were born med-free, and at home with a midwife.
If you don’t see me talking about natural birthing positions in the next few weeks, shoot me a reminder.
You definitely need to get those babies off your spine.
Oh, I forgot to tell you. I’m eagerly awaiting your next post about preparing for natural childbirth, and I’m following you now.
I too have big babies so I understand!! My first was a bad experience as she got stuck. My second was a planed c/s and it was GREAT and I was so alert! He nursed right away. However, having my first we had no idea how big she was and waiting (because I was stuborn) ended up causing more home. I couldn’t hold her for 6 hours and was in SEVERE pain from labor on top of a rushed c/s. My second c/s which was PLANNED was great and I was so happy i listen to my dr or I would have likely been in the same boat as I too just have big healthy babies.
@lauren,
this was meant to the lady that had c/s …@tracey
So thankful that your second c/s experience was better. Love hearing when sweet babies nurse right away.
I loved reading this, it’s as if you read my mind. I had all 4 of my babies naturally and woudn’t trade it for anything. My husband is a staticitan and at the time of our first pregnancy was working on women’s health drugs at a large pharmacutical company. With all the information he posessed we decided that natural was for us. We were most curious about the studies on the rates of c-sections in other countries verses the United States. Giving birth in America is big buisness, so many places have lost the fact that God designed our bodies to give birth. Modern medicine should be used to help those in distress and who need it not to fit into the hospitals schedule. It wasn’t so long ago that home birth was all that there was and the Doctor came to you. Hows that for personal care! Once birthing was moved out of the home things only went downhill from there, and they continue on that same course. Of course, not all of it was bad. We have come a long way in saving mothers and babies, but I can’t tell you how many Doctors simply quit delivering babies due to the high cost of malpractice insurance. This has happend to the practice I used to go to. If it continues women won’t have much of a choice and we will all go back to the way things were before and not all of that is good. The death toll for women giving birth back in the 1800′s was 50%. Somehow midwifery practices that have been handed down for thousands of years need to mix with modern medicine enabling women to have the best of both. Giving birth is not a buisness.
“Giving birth in America is big buisness, so many places have lost the fact that God designed our bodies to give birth. Modern medicine should be used to help those in distress and who need it not to fit into the hospitals schedule.” So true! I’m blessed to have had a doctor who believes in natural birth and practices the Bradley Method with his wife… but even he quit delivering this last year.
Good for you for knowing your body and what you want from a birth experience!
I’ve given birth to four babies (two of them twins), and each time has been completely different.
For the first, I was a teenager and placing the baby for adoption. I was alone and terrified. I couldn’t have managed without the epidural and a lot of medication.
For the twins, they were preemies and Twin A. was footling breech. They were delivered via c-section at 32 weeks. (And, thankfully, are healthy boys today! Thank you, God!)
And my last, the preschooler, was a VBAC. I had to look far and wide for a doctor who would let me do this, but because I had given birth before, I was a good candidate. (My c-section recovery was rough — I wanted to avoid that if I could.) I labored mostly at home, playing games with the twins, taking naps. I went to the hospital after my water broke. I did have an epidural (because I’m a huge pain wimp!!), but his birth was so beautiful. He was born an hour after we arrived at the hospital, in a quiet, calm setting.
I think being proactive about our babies’ births is such a good thing. This is the beginning of a journey with a child — not to mention our bodies that are going through the experience.
Many blessings on your journey! Thanks for sharing.
Bless your heart! You really have been through it all. Yes, proactive is a word that needs to be emphasized over and over again.
We chose to go with natural childbirth for many of the reasons you outlined- spirituality, naturality, health of myself and my son. Yet, all through our birthing class, they emphasized that circumstances arise where people who want to go natural can’t, and people who want an epidural can’t–the important goal of childbirth isn’t to prove something, but rather to have a healthy baby! I love that you emphasized this in your post.
Our birth ended up somewhere inbetween. We didn’t have an epidural, but when I started vomiting with every contraction, we went with the anti-nausea medication.
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Blech. I remember WANTING to vomit a time or two, but it never happened.
Dearest Amy, Thank you for bravely & lovingly tackling this! And you did it marvelously I must say. My husband and I knew what our priorities were and we both followed through on it! He helped A LOT and I will be forever grateful for how God helped us through each of our births. We had 4 very different scenarios; none easy or short, and in fact a couple were very challenging. However, we are not risk takers either and we knew God’s will for our family each time. The experiences of each birth strengthened our walk with the Lord and I remember each one. Most of all, the babies had no side effects and when health concerns did occasionally arise, we did not have to wonder if it was connected to the drugs. I am not critical of others; however, I find that I have avoided this subject so often because others were critical of us!
Each time I heard all the typical comments, “Oh you’re lucky it worked out for you”, “You must have had an easy birth,” “You just can’t imagine how hard it was for me!”
I have to admit that in my young age and my desire to not be viewed as a superhuman, I came to avoid the whole subject. Thank you for reminding me of what I have to be grateful for and that it’s ok to be proud of what my hubbie & I worked hard to do together! Praise God and I thank you!!
Blessings to you & yours~
Jujubees
I’m betting my 22-hour and 18-hour labors won’t be labeled “easiest ever” either. Giving birth naturally certainly doesn’t mean we had “easy” labors.
I am definitely glad I made it through natural childbirth, but wow, I wish it didn’t have to hurt so much!
True.
You left out the totally creepy feeling when they insert it! I’ve had 1 epidural for my 4th birth and hated it. Maybe because I’d already done it without medication previously, I found the medicated birth to be disappointing? That’s not the right word, but it wasn’t the fullness of the experience of unmedicated birth. I’ve never had one again and hopefully never will need one.
I left it out because I don’t know that feeling.
Sounds icky, though!
I shared similar thoughts not so long ago… http://jjandmichele.blogspot.com/2010/04/2-books-and-lot-of-ouch.html
Best wishes!
I think people that choose to go “natural” is great for them, personally it just wasn’t for me. However, I would like to point out a couple things.
I believe that delivering a baby in any form is “natural” & there is nothing wrong with using drugs to ease the pain if available.
I read many people talking about “wanting to be there” for the delivery & not just being handed a baby. Well, I don’t know what kind of delivery they had, but let me tell you even with an epidural I felt everything. Getting an epidural did not in any way slow my labor, prohibit me from getting into a proper birthing position, or inhibit me in any way.
Throughout the entire process I could feel the pressure, the urge to push, when I was pushing, & I even could feel the ripping when I tore. Granted I did not feel pain from those actions, but I could still feel the movements, including all the pushing & pulling.
After delivering the baby, I was in no way “out of it.” I was very much awake & lucid. I held my baby & fed her right up until the time she had to be taken to peds & when she got back I held her some more. Sure I couldn’t walk right away, but within just a couple hours I was fully mobile.
Like I said before, for those that want to go natural they should do it. But I’ve noticed a trend over the last couple years of people almost looking down upon those mothers who chose using medication for the delivery & I personally do not feel that having an epidural makes the process any less special or meaningful.
I had epidurals for both of my births (and I wouldn’t change a thing about either experience), but you are making me want to have another baby so I can try it again!! LOL! I’m loving this whole series, even though we are done. Keep it up!
I hate to say it but I’ll never get to experience a ‘natural’ delivery. I had an emergency c-section with my first, another emergency c-section with my second and this time it is scheduled because I was not able to find a Doctor who was willing to take the ‘risks’ after two c-sections, that was within a reasonable distance (I expanded my search to nearly an hour away from me. Talk about gas use!) With my first, I had not educated myself on natural-no medication-deliveries. I had figured, as all my friends had told me, I’d go into labor, get the epidural and pop the baby out. Things happened so fast once I had the epidural that before I knew it, I was in the OR, being sliced open. I later found out that my daughter’s blood pressure dropped and we developed pre-eclampsia. I also wasn’t dialating, etc. which they could have possibly intervened with but the epidural issues happened first.
With my second, I went in fully intending on no medication. I had educated myself, I knew what I wanted to do. But again, the same thing happened minus the epidural.
I’ve gone through times where I’ve felt ‘less’ of a woman, or even a Mother, because I could not give birth vaginally medication or no medication. I’d give anything to beable to do it but I’ve also come to terms with the fact that my body, and my babies, seem to not tolerate labor very well. And sometimes, reading posts such as this, or on any other site, give a bit of a pang for me because I do wonder…if I had educated myself with my first, would everything happened the way it had?
But when it comes to talking to other expectant Mother’s, I talk to them about non-medicated births, explain my situation and at least plant the seed in their head. Because even though I can’t do it, I’m in the cheering squad for those who can.
What a blessing you are to other expectant Mothers! Sharing both your story and cheering them on…
72 comments! Wow, Amy.
I chose to have two unmedicated childbirths for the same reasons that you listed here…and I’m so glad that I did. Were they painful? Yes. But they were also peaceful – the BEST days of my life.
Can’t wait for the labor day link up because I labored all day on labor day 2007, I had my son at a birth center so drugs were not an option. My daughter was born at home 4 months ago. I personally can’t imagine doing it any other way.
“For some women, an epidural is given as a last resort to relax the body so that the cervix will dilate. ”
Amy- thank you so much for including that statement. I am one of those women. Not every woman who opts for an epidural wants to have one. For me, it truly was a last resort. I was determined to have a natural birth. I studied the Bradley Method and did all of my exercises faithfully.
After laboring with my first for nearly 30 hours, un-medicated, all back labor, I was only dilated to 3 1/2. My body was beyond exhausted but I begged and pleaded with the doctors to let me keep going. They finally gently told me that if I could not relax and dilate, that I would indeed end up with an emergency C-section since the baby was showing signs of distress. I finally relented and once the epidural was in, I dilated to a 10 in just a few hours while I got some much needed sleep.
Although I did not have the birth experience I wanted, the end result was a healthy baby girl. The biggest lesson for me was to let go of expectations. My next two births were also medicated, for the same reason, but I was much happier and relaxed overall without the pressure on myself to “perform”.
I am happy to report I had no problems breastfeeding after all 3 births, and I am still nursing my little man today! (15 months)
Your story is my cousin’s story. Her body would. not. dilate. I’m thankful that the medication and the doctors are there when the body doesn’t do what it’s supposed to do. Praise God for your 3 precious births, and yay for no problems with breastfeeding!
I thoroughly enjoyed your post! I, too, am an unmedicated gal. For me, my reasons are similar to yours. I also like to be in charge of my body, and with the epidural, I definitely am not.
I was fortunate enough to deliver in Germany. They view childbirth in a very holistic way. You can check out my birth story : http://thebowenpeanut.blogspot.com/2010/01/ethans-birth-story-complete.html
Be sure to come back and link up your story when I post my Labor Day Linky (on Labor Day!)
I have 5 children. I decided long before I even got married that I wanted to give birth like my grandmother, great-grandmother, and so on would have done, as that was the way God intended… PLUS, I’m afraid of needles, and an IV is one BIG needle to me! LOL I went through the Bradley classes with my husband. He was my ROCK through all our births!
My first child was delivered with an OB… My second with our family physician, and our 3rd was with a Midwife…. this child just “popped out” and my midwife actually thanked me for “letting her watch”. All of these births were amazingly empowering for me, extremely bonding for our marriage allowing us to fall deeper in love with each experience, and an incredibe bonding experience for us and each child from the start. What I NEVER expected was how well these relaxation techniques and empowerment would help me get through the next two births!
My 4th pregnancy was identical twin girls. At 28 weeks gestation, one twin died inutero and the other twin was dying. I had an emergency C-section to save our surviving twin. The Bradley Method relaxation and breathing tips and all the intuition I had from natural birthing experiences with my previous births went into “automatinc mode” and I made it through the whole experience amazingly well. After that C-section, as soon as I was allowed up and walking I was moving. I took only 1 Motrin the entire 6 days in the hospital. The nurses were flipping out! I took NONE of the higher strength pain meds because I had relaxed and listened to my body. The nurses told me the fastest wasy to heal was to walk, so I did as much as I could. It was amazing! The more I walked, the better I felt, almost with each step! This experience I had to have a spinal, and I could not STAND the feeling! The catheter was NOT fun. The wait for the numbness to wear off was nearly unbarable! I HATED it all (I do not like to use this word, but it fits here). This was NOT an empowering birth. I felt cheated or robbed of my birth-experience. I was, however, able to rely on my empowerment of my 3 previous births. I KNEW that I could get through this, as well, because of those experiences, and my husband was –once again– my ROCK, by my side supporting me every step of the way.
My 5th child was a VBAC, obviously. And delivered with an OB. I was still able to go natural and loved that birth. It healed me from the surreal “nightmare” of the drug-assisted c-section that I felt “robbed” me of my birth experience. I know it was VERY necessary and I thank God every day for the intervention, as I wouldn’t have my sweetheart. I couldn’t help how I felt after that birth. It was just such a different experience than any of my other births. I was NOT in control and that was very unempowering. But I was able to take my power back and be in control, working with my body for my 5th child.
I know many good mothers who have had pain relief during labor. It does not make you a bad mother. I admit, I do have a high tolerance for pain, and this is such a different pain than any other. I medicate my migrains as soon as I have them, but those are non-productive and hinder my day. A birth can be a “beautiful pain” if you work with it. And some women are even able to relax enough NOT to feel pain so much as it’s just discomforting for them…
The choice is yours, though… God Bless!
So sorry for the loss of your little girl. You sound like a strong, strong mama.
I had an epidural with my first child, weighing 7 lbs 6 oz. With my second I went to a midwife center, they prepared me so much better for the experience. I had an 11 lb 10oz , 23.5 inch long son and felt so much better! I was at home within 9 hours of birth up and about. And felt so much better than the first birth. Everyone thinks I am nuts, but I know how I felt. Even with such a large birth weight difference. Natural was better for us both!
Oh. My. Goodness. That is one big baby. So happy for you to have a positive birth experience with him!
Would just like to say that nonintervention births are possible with big babies. My third was 10lb 8 oz but I had an amazing midwife at the birth who did a great job of helping the baby out. Without suction forceps or painrelief. But if she had been my first I am guessing it would have ended in a c section as I was so unprepared with my first. I never even saw a doctor during the birth of my third and did most of my labouring at home. So it doesnt have to be bad with a big baby.
Glad to hear your experience! My sister-in-law also had large babies with no intervention. I know it’s possible, just hate to speak for it myself since my babies have been on the smaller side.