I’m Living It

My children came home from school Friday afternoon.

We laughed, ate, played, and ate some more at our big family Christmas party all day Saturday.

They joined 13 others in the church Christmas program yesterday morning, belting out Mary Had a Baby.  I nearly didn’t have enough tissues.

The day-to-day is blog worthy.  They came home.  We laughed.  They sang.  Every ordinary thing, suddenly again extraordinary.

The Finer mundane Things, all a miracle.  All a gift.

Yes.  Sandy Hook could happen to any of us, but I will not live in fear.  I will simply live. 

I will scrub toilets and fold laundry.  I will scrape dried pancake batter off of the kitchen counter.  I will make to-do lists, both to focus my day and to celebrate the fact that in my spinning of the wheels I really do get something done.

I will grin, walking briskly home from the post office, when the postman offers to bring my packages to the house when he gets off of work.  I will recognize and celebrate the good that is all around. 

I will change diapers and cut up supper for little mouths.  I will scramble in the last week of Christmas to make it all imperfectly perfect, wrapping secrets and baking cookies.

But, what else?

I will (and have already) snap impatience.  I will scold, and likely pout.  I will sigh when nap times don’t coincide.  I am a mess. 

There is also this.

I will hug more and give undivided attention.  Will giggle instead of “Knock it off” when they tickle.  Will sing along at bedtime, making sure we end the day right.

But it won’t be perfect.  Because it’s life.  And I’m gratefully, imperfectly living it.




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  1. This was beautiful! Thank you for reminding us of the joy of simply living for today and doing what is in front of us.

  2. This post is a breath… a long deep breath… that says we will remember but not be defeated… we will move forward and choose not to waste what we have now… AMEN Amy!

  3. You are doing exactly right, Amy. This post is lovely. I’m struggling. I cringe when I hear myself laugh over some little thing, because it feels out of place in the darkness that surrounds me.

    • I don’t know if I ever do ANYTHING right, actually. But this is all I’ve got. So I’m living it! (I can’t fathom the “survivor guilt” in CT.)

  4. Amy, I love how you brighten our day! I too have been struggling, feeling like I need to do something…anything…rather than go about what I need to do…what is expected of me.
    Thank you…

  5. Thanks…I needed this. To live fearfully isn’t really living, but I did feel anxious as I took my first grader in today.

  6. I have been feeling dreadfully guilty when I “snap impatience”, and in the past few days, I’ve been trying hard not to say, “knock it off”. I must remember that there are mamas out there who would love to have their patience tried again.

  7. I really appreciated this post today!

  8. Great post!

    Was in Tiny Town last night, just as the sun had gone down and all was dusky. From the “big” highway it looked so picturesque and even more so as I drove through – seeing the homes all lite up with Christmas decorations and the lights on at the church. So funny that you should write about the Christmas program, confirming what I suspected, that something special would soon be happening there!

  9. Thank you. Thank you. Reading this as my oldest is being sent home because of a bomb threat at her school. The person who wrote, “we will remember, but not be defeated.” Thank you.

  10. This is beautiful. Yes, everyday is blog-worthy. In fact, I think that those imperfect moments blogged about are my favorite. No one has it all together. And yes we grieve, and we remember those lives lost — but we keep living. Amen.

  11. Thanks for the reminder not to live in fear. When darkness is around us, the best thing we can do is bring in the light. God promises the darkness won’t be able to withstand it.

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