I want to want to be the Crafty Mom who engages her children’s senses at every turn, patiently producing clever masterpieces each afternoon and never resorting to the tv after nap time.
I want to want to get up early and be dressed for the day and spend time reading and in meaningful prayer before my little ones wake and I get breakfast and change diapers and look at the clock and my dirty sleep shirt and it’s mid-afternoon.
I want to want to buy organic everything and not allow any processed foods in my home, nourishing my family with every delicious bite they consume.
I want to want to redeem my high school home ec. sewing mishaps and pull out the machine (that I don’t own) to whip a stitch or repair a button or create a costume.
I want to want to scrub with only homemade cleaners made with lemon juice and vinegar, ensuring the lowest toxicity for my home and my family.
I want to want to sooth my children’s every ill with natural remedies created with herbs that I tenderly grow on my windowsill.
I want to want to exercise six days a week, thirty minutes each day, alternating target areas, balancing strength and cardio, regaining the peak fitness and energy I enjoyed nearly 5 years ago.
I want to want to greet my husband at the door each day with a lipsticked smile, neatly coiffed hair (whatever that is), and a kiss like I mean it.
I want to want to make my noodles and my tortillas and my bagels and my english muffins (think I’m missing gluten much?!) from scratch, using freshly ground whole wheat flour.
I want to want to sing and dance and ride my bike and be the Fun Mom, so my kiddos can be the envy of every Tiny Town child.
But I don’t (always). And I can’t (sometimes). And I won’t. And… I shouldn’t. At least, not all at once. Not all right now.
Right now I’m the mom who sleeps as long as the baby sleeps each morning, because I’m the mom who is often up in the middle of the night with the same baby. I’m the mom who is going to buy a few boxes of Rice Chex in the morning, because going gluten-free is tricky and eggs can be eaten only so many days in a row. I’m the mom who has 47 projects started and would do cartwheels to finish even one.
And that’s okay.
It’s important to have goals. It’s necessary to learn and implement new ideas to make life healthier and fun. It’s good to strive for better.
Not all at once. Not all in this season. Good enough is good enough!
If you’re in a busy season (who isn’t?!) of getting by… of good enough, take heart. You’re not alone! Keep dreaming. Keep learning and working toward your goals, but keep it real!
What do you want to want to do… but you don’t?